Listening: The Answers Are Right There

2007 Open Mic Fremont, CA: Barnes and Noble

When you listen, everything you need to know is right there. A person who is talking, is not doing so to waste their energy. They are talking to communicate with you. Explain their boundaries, voice their needs, and to explain who they are. In a relationship, whether it is friend, boss, co-worker, or lover, listening is the best way to have a healthy partnership with the person receiving the words. When we do not listen, we miss out on the connection. When we misunderstand, we ass…u…me. When we ignore, we are focused on ourself, our Ego. The answers are right there. All you need to know about someone, they are telling you.

I am a psychotherapist, I work with people who are frustrated because you are not listening.

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Meditation: Life Changing Moments

A Kundalini yoga guru, that I took a class with in Los Angeles said, “If everyone did yoga, there would be less people in hospitals.” I have never been in a hospital, as a holistic practitioner.

In addition, I am adding, “If everyone did meditation, the world would be a calmer place.”

I tell people all the time, this is the best medicine for Anxiety.

So what is this all about?

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Seaside Hotel – Badehotellet: Danish TV Period Piece

thetvdb.com

This 10 season WWII Danish period piece ran from 2013-2024 and is quite addicting to watch. You will find it on PBS. I found it to be Denmark’s description of WWII, similar to A French Village, in that they are capturing a small community of people during this period of crisis. The differences are vast, in that A French Village shows more violence and causes more stress to the viewer. In fact, at the end of A French Village, I felt emotionally exhausted. But, the French period piece is doing a lot of “Show Don’t Tell,” vs. the Danish piece is “Telling but not Showing.” Which is fine and a unique way of narrating a horrible time in history. With Seaside Hotel, we are seeing amazing actors, never out of character, who are capable of telling the story of WWII and how it impacted them. These are middle to well to do characters who choose to consistently take room and board at this seaside hotel, during the summer season. It is strangely comforting, as if your grandparents or great grandparents are talking to you from beyond the grave.

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The Ironies of “Conversion Therapy” and Which Side You Are On

Alliance Defending Freedom adflegal.org

The American Heritage Dictionary defines Conversion as: 1. The act of converting and 2. The state of being converted. The third definition has to do with converting your religion, which is not part of this article. After the Supreme Court ruling on Chiles v. Salazar this last week, national organizations – politically liberal – for therapists are up in arms concerned about therapists “rights” even though they ruled in our favor. But it really depends on what side of the fence you are on politically as to whether it was in therapists favor or not. And, in respect to the term conversion, it is interesting that Colorado and 20 other states ban “conversion therapy,” but only if you are a conservative focused on children’s rights. It is perfectly okay to convert a child into changing their gender in these states (presumably if they all have similar wording to Colorado’s), but not okay to bring some balance to their childhood delusions especially when you are telling the therapist you are confused and need to talk it out (Kayley Chile’s Story). “Children in Colorado can be counseled toward dangerous drugs and surgeries—but not the reverse.” Quote from Kayley’s story.

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Shame Has to Change Sides – The Gisèle Pelicot Story

Ms. Pelicot’s story is one that I learned about in the news after the court hearing against her husband and other perpetrators began. She is from France. I was fascinated with the knowledge that she had requested the courtroom be opened to the public at the Palais de Justice. The title “Shame Has to Change Sides,” coincides with this. She had heard this term from a woman’s group, I believe she says in her book. It meant that instead of her facing the humiliation of being alone in the courtroom, with all of her perpetrators, instead, the room would be filled with journalists (from around the world) and women wanting to hear her story. These people, who flocked in daily once the word got out, were now facing the perpetrators, so they could not be anonymous. This was a very brave action on her part, especially as these people would also be witness to the humiliation and degradation that was done to her in more than a decade. The book she writes, “A Hymn to Life,” gives us the details of her fifty year marriage to the “monster.”

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Il Sorpasso 1962 – The Easy Life

Jean-Louis Trintignant and Vittorio Gassman

This movie came out the year I was born. It is a road movie or a coming of age film for two young men. Bruno (Vittorio Gassman – Italian) is an aging player, and Roberto (Jean-Louis Trintignant – French) a very down to earth college boy, studying law. Roberto is eager to remain the man that he is, but soon finds himself questioning life. He seems to have a love/hate relationship with Bruno, who he knows is not a good person deep down inside. Bruno, for whatever reason is escaping reality. We don’t really know his back story, though we know that he jumped into marriage with a beautiful woman and left her and their daughter to continuing roaming through life. At the end, both of these men’s lives will be turned upside down and Bruno himself will finally begin to question the life he has chosen.

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Thank you Mr. Dahlman for that Life Changing Moment

You wouldn’t think that writing a paper on religious cults would lead someone to a lifelong spiritual journey. If you didn’t grow up in Ohio or another Mid-west state, in a very isolated and controlled lifestyle, you really wouldn’t make that connection. This is how it happened for me and this is my gratitude to one teacher, for spurring on this moment in a little farm town called Pataskala.

Mr. Marty Dahlman was the P.O.D. teacher (Problems of Democracy) at Watkins Memorial High School. He went on to other things, such as a track coach, vice-principal or principle, I forget which. Once I left Ohio, I didn’t return until 2010, when I began catching up after this long absence at high school reunions. He is now retired from Watkins and writes a blogpost, called Our America – Essays on Politics and American Life.

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Dreams: God’s Forgotten Language – An Old Book With a Timeless Message

Ever since I was a young girl, I reflected on the meaning of God, on spirituality, on life. I tried following the church – as I was expected, but continued to fall short on what I wanted. Answers. I received regurgitated phrases that shed no sense of enlightenment which I sought. In confirmation I was taught how women are punished for Eve’s sin…Why, I had nothing to do with this – I thought. I was told “Because the Bible says so.” Which was exactly how my questions – any of them – were answered at home (with the word Bible exchanged for the word I). Nonetheless, I did not give up hope and continued to search. This began a lifelong journey; reading, workshops, college/grad school, spiritual teachers, all designed to awaken me into the person I am today. Not to mention my own life lessons.

Not one of us has so much faith that we have no doubts; not one of us has such purity that we have no darkness. Within every human attribute there hides somewhere its opposite. (p.18)

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