The above quote is the very first line you will read in Anna Karenina. It is the only line I really cherished as I couldn’t fathom the book. I could manage the movie but Russian writers are not my forte.
As we go into the holiday season, don’t focus on what you see on social media, focus on the reality of your own life, on how you can become a better person. I can tell you that so many of the lies you see on social media, I have learned about in my office. They are not happy families; they show you what they imagine they have. There are some rare circumstances but more and more, it is like finding that rare penny that will make you a millionaire.
In memory of my step/adopt father, Antal Végh, who came to this country in 1956, at the age of 19 and died only eight days before the 40th anniversary.
What would my dad say now, if he saw the country he escaped to in 1956, to have freedom, in the wake of communism in Hungary? I wonder what he would think of his daughter, standing in line at Kroger, in New Albany, Ohio, for thirty minutes around 8pm because they only had one cashier. No more “Three’s a Crowd,” customer service rules there (from a long ago commercial). An impromptu and unplanned demonstration, you might say, was going on with those of us in line. We refused to use self-service because most of us were in our 50’s and 60’s and understood what self-service meant. We lived through having the luxury of gas station attendants who washed our windows and changed our oil for free. What started with one lane for “self-serve” at a gas station went to all self-serve and people in a kiosk who couldn’t care less about your car.
I had the unfortunate experience the other night, while at the same Kroger’s dealing with an angry kiosk employee. I had rapped on the window because I kept saying hello and she didn’t answer. I peered through the window around the corner and saw her standing there, out of view. When she got to the window she replied “You didn’t need to tap on the window.” I replied that I had tried calling out and she did not respond. Kroger Fuel will not accept Master Card, so I have to go to the kiosk to pay. I know what happens to pin numbers at the pump, by ne’re-do-wells. So, what would my dad say to my having to stand in line for food? He refused to go to any restaurant, when he was alive, if there was a line. This is because, in Hungary, he remembered food lines and would never approach one ever again.
When I first learned about female genital mutilation, it was sometime in the 90’s. I went to an art installation. I later read about it through Planned Parenthood’s international newsletter. I saw terrible photos of little girls in kitchens with a person wielding some sort of machete, I think it was. Those images disturbed me to no end. Children should have rights. The rights of their parents to protect and safeguard their well-being. They should be listened to and respected, but the parents should be the adults, who teach right from wrong. Parents should be teaching values, educating the child, providing them with their basic needs.
Prohibition taught us many things. If we take away something that someone wants and already has the right to have, they will get it anyway they can. The mafia took over and ran our streets. Abortion rights were given to women so that they didn’t have to go into a filthy hovel and have some woman or man cut them up and perform a “surgery” that many women died from. The same people who fight for Abortion rights are fighting for “gun violence” laws. Politicians, who don’t give a damn about people and are focused on winning elections have said the same stupid lines since Columbine. Women and men continue to have no respect for their bodies and continue to not use birth control and bring babies into the world that they have no business giving birth to. This is the argument. Listen. Read a history book.
A wonderful conversation with Evelyn about her 55 year relationship with her husband and what makes it work. The second in my series on Staying True to the Self in a Healthy Relationship.
Recently, a client of mine raved about this movie that she begged me to watch. Generally, I don’t watch American films as I find them dull and boring. An egotistical showcase for some smarmy actor or actress who is overused, overacting, and not interesting in the least. The storyline often lacks depth and integrity. However, I could see before my eyes, the breakthrough my client had had, in regard to forgiveness and revenge: two topics we had been working on for several weeks. I was captivated by their unyielding dedication and the trailer they showed me in session convinced me.
Disclaimer: As we are two humble therapists, all discussion you see between us in the video/podcast is based on our training and education, therapeutic work in our practices, and thoughtful opinions formed over our years of working with the population we discuss. We are not the last word in this discussion, and we commit to providing ongoing resources beyond ourselves to enlarge your understanding of this complex subject. Thank you for viewing and we hope this will be helpful in your recovery process.
Michelle Risser is a licensed clinical social worker as well as being a life coach for therapists who happen to be mom’s as well. She will be talking about her new online business, as well as explaining what the differences are between a coach and a therapist. She will also discuss and explain EMDR. Her website is JoyfulHappyMom.com
My premier course is now available at Udemy.com and I hope you will take the time to sign up and take the class! I think you will find it will enrich your life by learning more about what the Narcissist is, how it has effected your life and much more. Thank you!
Two years ago, my uncle died. A beloved past-minister, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, son, and so on. He was well known in many communities of people. When I called my mother to ask about the funeral arrangements, she informed me there would not be one. I was really upset to hear this. It was because the family, with his knowledge, had felt that they did not want to do this. They didn’t want a bunch of commotion. I was furious with this but my words could not be heard because his family are people that when they make a decision, they are not detracted.
As a psychotherapist, who deals with death and dying quite frequently from survivors who come into my office, I know the importance of grief. A funeral is not for the dead, it is for the living. It is for the people who love the departed one and who need to come together in memorial of this person to “sing” their praises. When you deny a funeral from your loved one’s and those who knew of you, you are keeping them from being in congregation with one another and withholding their ability to have closure.
Reflections Inspired by A Course in Miracles, A Course of Love, The Way of Mastery, Choose Only Love, & The Way of the Marys. . .with Celia Hales - https://www.amazon.com/author/celiahales
Jeannine Vegh 