Outing Celebs who are Dead, is Vulgar and Irresponsible

Liberace was a “flaming fag,” as we used to say in the 80’s. He wasn’t married to a woman, he didn’t try to hide being gay by the way he dressed or acted on stage or in real life. While he didn’t come right out and say “I am gay,” or in his day – a homosexual because saying gay would mean he was giddy or happy, it is safe to say that he wouldn’t be upset that we all know he was gay. Likewise, we could safely say this about Oscar Wilde or Lord Byron and countless others who didn’t take great pains to make sure we didn’t know.

On the other hand, focusing on Cary Grant’s love life or Katherine Hepburn’s or Spencer Tracy’s or even Eleanor Roosevelt’s is inexcusable. It is disrespectful of their families, their husbands and wives, of their name and of their legendary status. If something is not written in their will or if they have taken great pains to hide their love life; than it is none of our business. Yet magazines and their sensationalist journalists take great pains to “expose” them as if they have abused children or animals and need to have their life paraded around the town square for the entire world to see and know.

Life was different in their time period. People had class and very high expectations of themselves and others. Men and women dressed elegantly and went out to dinner with gloves on and hats. They wore fur stoles or full length coats or capes that were left in a cloak room with a “hat check girl.” They drew nicotine from long stems and cocked their heads back when they let out the smoke in a very graceful way. They ate lavish meals and watched performances, which included full orchestras with singers and maybe dancers as well. When they left, they went onto parties or home or somewhere else. The story ended there.

Recently, Scotty Bowers a celebrity pimp at 94 years old, has decided he needs to ruin the reputations of some really wonderful people that we all grew to love and adore. These were people whom we romanticized and fantasized about when we thought of their relationships, or their movies, or their place in office. The meaning of legendary is someone that no one can replace. It is someone who was unique, a valuable contribution to the world, stellar, intelligent, and larger than life.

When they are then exploited for being gay behind closed doors, you are taking away that legendary status by turning them into a common person. You are saying that they had flaws like the rest of us. That beneath that smile was nothing but lies. You are taking away the image we have of them and turning them into nothing more than a Jimmy Saville. And for what purpose? Why do we need to know who was gay and who wasn’t gay? Who does this help? Do we need to meet a quota in today’s society to validate ourselves in the lifestyle we are now living?

“Women He’s Undressed,” sounds demeaning just hearing the title. As I watched this documentary about an Australian designer by the name of Orry-Kelly, I felt embarrassed and uncomfortable as he began to rat out Archie Leach’s lifestyle and then tell us that Cary Grant took great pains to shut him up before he died. Naturally, it is hard to have any respect for Orry-Kelly; as a result of watching this. I began to understand why Cary walked away from him because he was a spineless prick; like most people in the fashion industry. Always out to stab people in the back and then curtsy, while blushing on their way out the door. It’s supposed to be seen as charming and yet it made me want to vomit; which is why I got out.

As I am in the psychology world now, I am equally insulted by fools who focus on the fact that Freud was a cocaine addict or that Jung screwed his clients. None of this was taboo in their time period because they were the fathers of psychology and had not yet determined ethics and laws that are relevant today. Doctors handed out cocaine, heroin, and many other substances that are considered illegal today but weren’t then. It is because therapists or psychoanalysts did what they did that we now know better. But to focus on their behaviors that were inconsequential in their day, takes away from the valuable contributions that they made to psychology.

When I watch an old film, I don’t want to think about the fact that he or she was a dyke or a fag. I want to think about their wit, their je ne sais quois. Yet when someone puts something into my mouth, I can’t get rid of the taste of it. The memory is stuck. When we see these people on screen, it is important to leave them with their clothes on. We want to keep their voice resonating in our head. We want to recall their walk across the room. We want to envy their wives/husbands, children and imagine what it must have been like to be in the room with them.

If these people were alive today, more than likely they would sue the rags that printed them just as Tom Cruise used to do with National Enquirer. Now all magazines and newspapers, the Internet as a whole, seem focused on becoming trashy, smutty, tell-alls who have nothing better to do with their life than to ruin others. When you do this to a dead man, you are essentially spitting on their grave and that of their kin. Allow these people to rest. Allude to their behind the scenes arrangements but really and truly, if they aren’t Jimmy Saville, let it rest. Keep them a legend, a mystery, a well-loved hero/heroine.

StyleWe Clothing

I haven’t actually purchased anything from this website but I have looked at some of their choices a few times. I am not sure about the quality of the clothing, the difficulty of not having an actual storefront to walk in. I have chosen some photos here to give you a sampling of what is on offer. The clothing is versatile in the sense that they have outfits that could be appropriate for different age ranges. The sizes are a crap shoot between 0-12, so it is frustrating because you are going to open pages and find that it only goes to 8. I don’t see any way of choosing your size from the top. These are considered designer clothes at an average person’s prices but keep in mind some prices are a little steep.

An evening out, an anniversary party, a wedding, the theater. Or perhaps you will don your Irish stepping shoes and get in line!

 

 

 

 

 

A modern work dress with a good length to it for a manager or the owner of a company.

 

 

 

 

 

A throwback to Chanel, a little too short for a work dress but tasteful all the same. This makes me think of a secretary or Administrative Assistant.

 

 

 

 

 

While I don’t like the color, the style is elegant and offers quite a bit of movement. The length is ideal. Definitely a dress for a CEO.

 

 

 

Blue is definitely not sullen here with these bold stripes to bring attention, creating a high waistline and graceful movements. For the upwardly mobile gal.

 

 

 

A fun blouse for a creative office place and paired with a nice pair of trousers can be comfortable and easy for movement.

 

 

 

 

The caption on the site does not say what the heal height is which always gets my goat, though these do seem modest. With the right dress, you will be the envy of the room. They show them in a dark blue color as well.

 

 

 

A working girls shoes with a comfortable height for someone who is walking around the office trying to keep the team together. They can also be used for a day out shopping, luncheon with some friends or even a daytime wedding.

 

 

A darling little evening clutch, though you’ll have to wear it over your shoulder as the flowers aren’t ideal for holding in your hands.

The Language of Fashion

If French is the language of fashion then we are speaking in Ebonics right now. Anna Wintour showed us just how pathetic we have become by putting Kim Kardashian and Kanye West on the cover of the American version of Vogue in April 2014. Two people who have a lack of respect for themselves and the people around them. One makes a name for herself on a reality show and the other for his ruthless behaviors toward Taylor Swift. Neither have any sense of decency nor does our society for allowing this to happen. Women in the workplace are dressed like Rosie the Riveter rather than executive material and technically speaking Rosie dressed much nicer. We have come a long way since Chanel and Dior but instead of being on a continued climb, we are on a downward spiral. Fashion designers boast the newest trends in holey blue jeans that even a farmer would never dare to wear. Boys on the streets pull their pants down and their hats backwards. Schools and offices have given up on dress codes and have given way to selling out to slang rather than teaching work ethics. Corporations have outsourced our jobs to China and India and every other third world country and we have lost any sense of customer service or respect for the consumer in general. Department stores have become dinosaurs as we are forced to shell out online for clothing that often does not fit, isn’t the right color, style, and then we must go out of our way to return it through a subcontractor rather than a store with a nice smiling employee to take down our concerns.

Aidez-moi!!! What does one do? Mostly, it appears we give up and give in. We adopt the motto “It is what it is,” which is no more capitalistic in thought than a collective farm in Russia. What happened to elegance? Stanley Marcus tells us that it died in his first memoir “Quest for the Best.” If he could see his store now partnering with Target, as they did in 2013; no doubt he’d be rolling in his grave. My sense is that the final chapter of elegant society died at the close of WWI. Watch any period piece surrounding this era and you will see what I am talking about.

So where does one shop if they are clearly not interested in following these trends but remembering the values taught to them by their grandmothers, aunts and mothers? I find this to be a struggle and I hope that those of you who follow this blog have some insight on where to go. This website is for classic minded women who hope to reclaim fashion as it really has nowhere to go.  If we are in the depths of despair, it is time to throw down a rope so we courageous ladies can start climbing. I am not a designer, just a writer, so I have no ability to reshape this industry in any way other than my thoughts. I hope to find more of you out there who are hiding behind your fresh pressed suit at your place of business or the belle of the ball because you are the only one who knew how to dress for the occasion. Only the bride seems to be interested in a traditional dress for a wedding but we know she is not a virgin. The guests now show up like its casual Friday, yet thousands of dollars are spent on an overrated party because the couple is likely going to divorce within a few years.

Class cannot be bought or sold. You either have this or you don’t. Once we had a time where people knew their place in society and this was dependent on their economic standing. I don’t think this was wrong, I think it makes sense that people of wealth shop and eat in one place and people of middle classes at their place and lower incomes at their places. It meant that you couldn’t walk into doors unless you were dressed a certain way. I don’t think the attitudes of the day were correct because people were left out for religion and race as well but the overall rules made sense. It gave you something to strive for in life or it helped you to be comfortable with where you are at. Now you see people in nice restaurants who are dressed in jeans and flip flops and this ruins the ambiance. If I have gotten to a place in my life where I can afford certain things, I don’t want to feel like I have made all this money just so I can see the same thing I will see if I walk down the streets of the inner city.

Likewise, I enjoy luxury. This means I do not prefer to wear faux anything. It is nice that some people have beliefs of advocating for the rights of this and that, but this is not what I am taking a stand for. I don’t think it is right that other people’s rights should be enforced upon me anymore than being told I should vote for X, Y or Z. A democracy means that we each have a right to our opinion. Communism is group think and I don’t aspire to being like everyone else. Naturally I would prefer that furriers have a more ethical approach to preparing a coat but I don’t want to wear polyester. Leather is much healthier for the feet than polyurethane as it allows for your skin to breathe.  I certainly would rather wear a diamond that wasn’t mined by slaves but I won’t be wearing cubic zirconia. I eat chocolate not carob. I drink Dom Perignon when the time is right and this has happened about twice in my life. I would rather be caught dead than enter a franchise for gastronomic delights. Good food comes from the energy of the cook and from a person who is passionate about his or her menu and recipes. Therefore, I would prefer not to enter the universe looking as if I have no self-respect. I would prefer not to be the best dressed person in the room but in competition with other women of considerable taste. Sadly, it is a rare day when I actually like what someone else is wearing.

In fact, I have loved fashion since I was a young girl. Even going to church was a parade of costumes worn by the ladies and the most special time was around the holidays. Once I begged my parents to stop the car so I could find out where a lady had purchased her shoes – they didn’t. I adored weddings as this was a time to wear a formal and special dress shoes. When I met my first fashion buyer, I was in love with the career on the spot. The idea that she got to travel and purchase clothing for the store was the most amazing concept to me. Heading off to FIDM was a dream come true. But then the bubble began to burst. I saw the type of personalities in fashion that I was not accustomed to back home. They did not respect work ethics but friendships and secret passwords and handshakes it would seem. After leaving the industry and choosing an alternative career, I began to notice with the advent of computers was the decline in moral standards. With a decaying of our society will naturally result in a lack of interest in what we wear. I once told a friend, after watching the Calvin Klein commercial in the 80’s that being naked will be our fashion statement one day. He thought I was nuts. Like the decline in the U.S. Vogue magazine in 2014, the next year news headlines for the Hollywood Report would say “Met Gala 2015: Who Was the Most Naked on the Carpet?”

S’il Vous Plait, throw some of us women a rope! For those of us who care enough about the future of our society and want to bring fashion back to a place of respect. Who are tired of seeing young women in 6” heels and mini-skirts without panties; only to find them pregnant without a man in the near future.  If these were “working women” of the streets one could understand but we are talking about girls who are giving up their chance at college and a career for a boy whose name they can’t remember from a party where they aren’t sure how they got home.

Ladies, I have sounded the alarm. Stand behind me and lets prepare to shift the fashion realm of consciousness and find a psychic to help us channel in Gabrielle and Christian and Jean and Elsa or whomever your favorite designer was of yesteryear.