Tag Archives: Women

Confessions of a Promiscuous Woman

Posted on by
Reply
from Artspace.com

On the heels of yesterday’s post, Confessions of a Trauma Bond Survivor, I will continue to tell Annika’s story from the other side (I am also continuing to share this in first person). Having been through this horrible ordeal with her previous lover, and going through the pain and suffering from this trauma bond, Annika began to awaken her consciousness by taking responsibility for how she got here. There are two sides to every story. No one is born a narcissist and no one is born a victim. We make interpretations from the cards that are dealt to us, along the way.

Continue reading →

Confessions of a Trauma Bond Survivor

Posted on by
5
The Covert Narcissist taking his mask off – in the end.

I met with a woman, I will name “Annika,” (a favorite pseudonym of mine), who told me some details about her life story with men. She gave me permission to write about her story here. I am going to write this in “first person,” as if it were a memoir. She is not a client and, I say this, so if my clients are reading this, they won’t think it is their story. I am breaking this up into different parts. I start with this aspect of her journey: coming back from being in a trauma bond after the break-up with a covert narcissist.

Continue reading →

Corridor of Mirrors: Portrait of a Covert Narcissist

Posted on by
Reply

Last night, I watched a 1948 British classic, “Corridor of Mirrors.” I started by looking on Kanopy, at various films and kept seeing “psychological” thriller or mental health issues and I said to myself “not in the mood for psychology tonight.” Then I see this film and it says it is about a man who thinks this woman is his reincarnated lover from 400 years ago. Sounded intriguing to me and I set about to watch it. The sound was horrible and I had to re-start it three times and finally, put on closed captioning so I knew what they were saying. I was a little confused with the storyline in the beginning too, but kept at it. Then, we get to the character Veronica, who “is allowed” to live in the basement of the mansion. It is where the main male lead, Paul, lives in. Veronica spells out his personality, almost like she is giving the description of a covert narcissist. I thought to myself, “Oh, well now, I have to sit up straight and pay more attention to this storyline.” I just can’t get away from my specialization at the office. And, I knew this was going to be a film I would be talking up to my clients. And, it is an amazing film. It is different from Gaslight, which is focused on the title. This film, bares a lot more explanation to the average person. So, here we go.

Continue reading →

I Knew a Man

Posted on by
Reply

I knew a man who did not know how to love a woman.

He could not love himself.

He was filled with anger and hatred for a girl in his past.

He determined this was her fault.

Then he decided it was me he was angry with, because of her.

He forgot that he loved me, or did I only imagine that he had?

He was unable to empathize with others in pain.

He would not allow himself to feel.

I loved and adored this man and gave him all that I had to give.

He never saw this because he could not believe this.

I thought that his praises and rewards and adoration were acceptance.

He was patronizing and biding his time.

I assumed that his smile and willingness and gifts were acknowledgement.

He was the good guy, and I was filling a gap.

In the end he could not say goodbye. He was unable to just walk away.

He had to find a way to make me wrong. This made it easier on him.

For so long, I searched for answers as I sat in denial.

I wanted to believe he would return. I wanted to believe I was wrong.

The thought of never seeing, touching, or being held by him was more than I could bare.

If this were true than the whole time was no more than a mirage.

I would be laughed at for being such a fool and the humiliation was more than I could take.

Deceit is a game I do not play and yet he had no qualms about playing me.

All alone I sat in wait, month by month, hoping and praying.

In darkness, I saw a shadow of light, as time went on, it became brighter.

God held my hand as I returned to walk beside him once more.

If I should falter, He stood me back up.

Once more I walked my path alone, though this time reassured.

My devotion and faith – now consistent and clear.

He will lead us together, and I will find, the person I thought that I already had.

 

Jeannine Vegh, 2021

Manners, Morals, Faith and Values: A Decline in Current Civilization

Posted on by
1

I blame my own generation for the current downfall of manners, morals, faith and values. We stopped paying heed to these rituals and rules to continue rebelling and punishing our parents for corporal punishment and other frustrations growing up. However, this decline is seen generation after generation, due to wars which caused society to shift from a state of depression with the loss of sons, brothers and husbands, but also economic changes as well. The decline also has suffered due to relocation of families, who are no longer near grandparents, uncles and aunts. Of course now we have social media, cell phones, texting which all correlate to a decline in the above as well as religious practice or even spiritual beliefs as well. Will we ever go back, I certainly hope so but it is highly unlikely. People get lazy and just as their ancestry or cultural background is watered down from the old country to the grandchild, the same has occurred for manners, morals, faith and values.

Continue reading →

Aging – An Enlightening Conversation

Posted on by
Reply

How about some uplifting ideas about aging. We’ve been trained to think we are born, age, deteriorate and die. Guess what….there’s much more to life and Life Force experiencing than that. We look at aging through various lenses: societal, cultural, family of origin, and higher consciousness.  Hear our mix of awarenesses as your consciousness expands.

To learn more about the presenters:

Ellen Seigel, LISW-S To work with Ellen as a Transformational Life Coach contact her: ellen@BeHappyNoMatterWhat.com or call 614-389-5795

To receive enlightening Contemplative Thoughts daily and receive a chapter download from her book Be Happy No Matter What – 5 Steps to Inner Freedom, visit http://behappynomaterwhat.com

Jeannine Vegh, IMFT at Transformative Psychotherapy, LLC https://jkvegh.com Survivors of Narcissists Workshop available at Udemy https://www.udemy.com/course/embracin… Blogposts on Psychology, the Arts and Ohio Women’s History https://discerninggal.com

Disclaimer: As we are two humble therapists, all discussion you see between us in the video/podcast is based on our training and education, therapeutic work in our practices, and thoughtful opinions formed over our years. We are not the last word in this discussion, and we commit to providing ongoing resources beyond ourselves to enlarge your understanding of this complex subject. Thank you for viewing and we hope this will be helpful as you move forward on your journey.

A Secure and Healthy Relationship: What does this Look Like?

Posted on by
Reply

A secure and healthy relationship is what all men and women aspire to be in. How do we find these partners? What do they look like? Where are they hiding? What am I doing wrong that I seem to attract the same type of person over and over again?

First, we have to work on ourself. Birds of a feather, flock together. If you are an angry person, a secure and healthy person is not going to stick around very long. It is not unusual that you would attract drama into your life. An addict is not going to attract someone who is healthy and secure, they would not feel comfortable being with someone who is unable to function without a glass, pipe, horse race, pill, etc… A person who has lots of mental health issues – PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, Personality Disorders and is not working on themselves, is not going to attract a secure and healthy relationship. Likewise, if you are insecure, immature, unhealthy – physically, avoidant, you are not going to attract a secure and healthy partner. So, what is the answer to this question? Find a really good therapist who specializes in helping you to get into a better place in your life and then you will attract that healthy partner toward you.

Continue reading →

Evelyn and Antonio – Staying True to Themselves 55 years in

Posted on by
Reply

A wonderful conversation with Evelyn about her 55 year relationship with her husband and what makes it work. The second in my series on Staying True to the Self in a Healthy Relationship.