Tag Archives: Seniors

Getting Married at 64 – Eyes Wide Open

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Getting married the second time around – for both of us, we had our eyes wide open. This was more honest, clear, conscious and rewarding.

As a result, there were no young adult expectations, everything was discussed up front and no uncommunicated concerns about moving forward in marriage. Our first marriages lasted about five minutes – so to speak, both were abusive, emotionally and mentally immature and both had no qualms about breaking vows. Oddly, both our ex’s were veterans, though I don’t blame the military for their lack of responsibility – mental health issues were clearly to blame. Paul and I believe in loyalty, fidelity and emotional commitment. We are clear that this marriage is for the rest of our lives and we treat our marriage, as we have our relationship the last three years, as a team. Nothing will change for us, other than we are “legal” now and our love became even deeper as we said our vows. What lessons I have learned about getting married and the process of having a wedding, I will share with you here.

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Finding a Home for Stanley – The Burdens of Dementia

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Taken in the late 80’s.

Firstly, I live in Ohio, my birth father lives in Florida. I have no idea when the VA diagnosed him with dementia, I began realizing over the phone something was wrong a year or so ago. I started getting calls from his landlord (who lived with him) last year and we kept in touch. In June, he gave him till the end of July to leave. This was on me as Stan wouldn’t have remembered and they may have had words. I found out a month ago, that luckily, he signed me up as his medical power of attorney. He gave me some paperwork in around 2016 and I assumed it was for after he died. I didn’t really read it or look it over too carefully. Having worked in Children’s Protective Services, (albeit in CA), I assumed it wouldn’t be too hard dealing with the Adult version in FL. Boy, was I wrong. When I say a person has to be out of the house they are renting by July 31st, this does not mean August 4th. But, when you deal with the government, you are on their time. It doesn’t matter what you need or want. I am sure this issue is in every state though, not just Florida. Also, there is more to the story. This is not the man who raised me but a man I have been in touch with a couple of times a year.

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Being a Woman

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Sugar and spice and everything nice…

Mother Goose nursery Rhyme

Hardly! Though it is a beautiful thing, to hear nursery rhymes, and other fairy tales as a child. I remember how lovely these worlds seemed and how I wanted to be in them. It is up to the parent to help transition the child, into the realities of life once they hit puberty. Unfortunately, in a traumatic household, the child figures it out for themselves.

Recently, I turned 60 years old. I took a trip with a good friend of mine, another therapist, for four days. She is 73. Her job was to help me transition into my sixth decade. I perceived this birthday as one that would cause a lot of depression and anguish for me. It did not. The reason for this was that I was not alone. I had built up a strong female support system in the past year. They are all in my age group or older and they all resonated with what I felt like. On my big day, they sang songs, sent cards, they all made a point of congratulating me in their own special way. There is nothing like having strong, trustworthy, faithful female friends during a time of need. It is part of what being a woman is all about.

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Aging – An Enlightening Conversation

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How about some uplifting ideas about aging. We’ve been trained to think we are born, age, deteriorate and die. Guess what….there’s much more to life and Life Force experiencing than that. We look at aging through various lenses: societal, cultural, family of origin, and higher consciousness.  Hear our mix of awarenesses as your consciousness expands.

To learn more about the presenters:

Ellen Seigel, LISW-S To work with Ellen as a Transformational Life Coach contact her: ellen@BeHappyNoMatterWhat.com or call 614-389-5795

To receive enlightening Contemplative Thoughts daily and receive a chapter download from her book Be Happy No Matter What – 5 Steps to Inner Freedom, visit http://behappynomaterwhat.com

Jeannine Vegh, IMFT at Transformative Psychotherapy, LLC https://jkvegh.com Survivors of Narcissists Workshop available at Udemy https://www.udemy.com/course/embracin… Blogposts on Psychology, the Arts and Ohio Women’s History https://discerninggal.com

Disclaimer: As we are two humble therapists, all discussion you see between us in the video/podcast is based on our training and education, therapeutic work in our practices, and thoughtful opinions formed over our years. We are not the last word in this discussion, and we commit to providing ongoing resources beyond ourselves to enlarge your understanding of this complex subject. Thank you for viewing and we hope this will be helpful as you move forward on your journey.