Virginia Roberts Giuffre – Nobody’s Girl

People magazine

This book was probably the hardest and most challenging book for me to read. Not because of what she suffered, I was a social worker for 8 years and read hundreds of reports about child molest, dealt with clients who were trafficked, girls who were used as prostitutes on the street. It was the “Why” that kept nagging in the back of my head. Why was this incredibly, or seemingly strong woman having a book published posthumously? Why did she die by suicide? As a psychotherapist, I kept searching for answers throughout the book, and I walked away feeling as if I understood what they were.

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The Red Virgin – Captive of the Narcissistic Mother

Hildegart Rodríguez

Who was Aurora Rodríguez Carballeira and what made her become the obsessed narcissistic mother of Hildegart? So little is known about this woman but much is known about Hildegart because of her writings. She was conceived sometime in 1914 and born at the end of the year on December 9th in Ferrol, Spain. She died 18 years later at the hands of her mother’s gun. In the meantime, she was the protégé of her mother, who held her emotionally and sometimes physically captive in their home where she was under the “protection” of her mother. We only have the Spanish movie “The Red Virgin,” to give us a glimpse of what the screenplay writer wants us to know and understand.

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Pretend I’m Not Here – Barbara Feinman Todd

I really enjoyed reading this book from beginning to end, and I am not a liberal. Ms. Feinman Todd explores herself psychologically, throughout the book, which I appreciated. I think it builds trust and character in a human; when they can be real with their audience. It is something I try to do myself with my posts.

To say she has been humbled is putting it lightly. It isn’t so bad when you are being thrown under the bus by a girlfriend or boyfriend, teacher or boss. But when that person is Bob Woodrow (Watergate fame) and Hillary Clinton, yeah, that is a bit of a hiccup.

Part way into the book, I actually looked her up online as I thought she looked familiar. Not because of this infamous 15 minutes but I thought she might have been to the California Writer’s Club bi-annual conference perhaps. This is when I read the part about the hiccup, when her book was reviewed by her old “boss” at the Washington Post – where she got her start in life as a researcher and subsequent “ghosting” gigs. Needless to say, they blamed her and of course stood up for their top writer. One more reason to never trust the media. I learned this by being a social worker where you can’t speak out for the children you are responsible for. The media just makes things up, or covers their ass.

As I noted, she shared herself quite openly in this book. It is not hard to see how a young woman, looking up to a highly revered reporter – whom she has put on a pedestal – would trust him over her own intuition. How many times have women succumbed to the charms of a man. The prisons are filled with women who have committed an act for a man, very rarely is it of their own volition.

I write about narcissism all the time, on my psychology page. This is what I specialize in – survivors of narcissists. Not saying Bob is a narcissist, just saying that it is interesting when people don’t take responsibility for their actions. To think people are that naïve – well, they are, sad but I am trusting the little guy over the big guy. I mean, even if she went to see Bob and blurted out confidential information – a bigger person, who knew he was her mentor, would have counseled her and kept it to themselves. But, Bob isn’t a psychotherapist who retains confidential information. Although he did for “Deep Throat,” but only his name, not the confidential information. You never reveal your source. He is a big time reporter that gets people impeached. I am sure by then (late 90’s), he had become a bit big for his britches. How I am looking at it, was it really that important that the American people knew that Hillary was into psychics? BFD. As Kenny Rogers said, no when to hold them and no when to fold them. Personally, I would never trust the guy. Luckily, I doubt I will ever have to.

The complete title of the book (published 2017) is “Pretend I’m Not Here.” The secondary title, “How I worked with three newspaper icons, one powerful first lady, and still managed to dig myself out of the Washington swamp.” Quite a mouthful. I picked it up on sale at the Worthington Library for the title, not the secondary byline. It is easy to get the point when the book is written by a woman.

Face to Face: Carl Gustav Jung – My Thoughts

This is a really profound and historical interview with Carl Gustav Jung. It was conducted by a British interviewer in 1959, by the name of John Freeman. This interview took place in his home in Switzerland, which is on a lake. What is amazing is how good his English is and how prolific he could speak in this language. Even the accent is very lite. Some of the wonderful comments that caused awe and interest for me the most are noted below:

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Holiday Family Chaos – Rising Above The Social Media Lies and Distortion

The above quote is the very first line you will read in Anna Karenina. It is the only line I really cherished as I couldn’t fathom the book. I could manage the movie but Russian writers are not my forte.

As we go into the holiday season, don’t focus on what you see on social media, focus on the reality of your own life, on how you can become a better person. I can tell you that so many of the lies you see on social media, I have learned about in my office.  They are not happy families; they show you what they imagine they have. There are some rare circumstances but more and more, it is like finding that rare penny that will make you a millionaire.

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The Pathological Liar: The Spin Doctor – Learn From and Grow

If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State. Adolph Hitler, Mein Kampf

The pathological liar is a covert narcissist, an addict, a psychopath, a sociopath, a gaslighter, or you could say a spin doctor. No matter what you attribute it to, if you are listening to someone who is trying to make you believe something, that you know in your heart to be untrue, this person has prepared their case very well. You may love them, you may have given birth to them, they may be your parent or grandparent, nonetheless, you must trust your soul. Learn from this and grow.

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Happiness: Ellen and Jeannine in an Enlightening Conversation

The many perspectives we share in this episode will stimulate new self understandings, going beyond society’s general view points on the matter and take you further in your quest to experience happiness and satisfaction as a default setting.

To learn more about the presenters:

Ellen Seigel, LISW-S To work with Ellen as a Transformational Life Coach contact her: ellen@BeHappyNoMatterWhat.com or call 614-389-5795 To receive enlightening Contemplative Thoughts daily and receive a chapter download from her book Be Happy No Matter What – 5 Steps to Inner Freedom, visit http://behappynomaterwhat.com

Jeannine Vegh, IMFT at Transformative Psychotherapy, LLC https://jkvegh.com Survivors of Narcissists Workshop available at Udemy https://www.udemy.com/course/embracin… Blogposts on Psychology, the Arts and Ohio Women’s History https://discerninggal.com

Disclaimer: As we are two humble therapists, all discussion you see between us in the video/podcast is based on our training and education, therapeutic work in our practices, and thoughtful opinions formed over our years. We are not the last word in this discussion, and we commit to providing ongoing resources beyond ourselves to enlarge your understanding of this complex subject. Thank you for viewing and we hope this will be helpful as you move forward on your journey.

Patterns in the Narcissists Behaviors

Personally and professionally, I have dealt with narcissistic men in relationships, as family members, as clients, and in business. I like to study patterns that I see that continue to appear over and over again, as a psychotherapist and began to reflect on this when it came to the narcissist specifically; for this post. This is not research, just an observation that I have seen, heard, learned of. I do not work with the narcissist (except when they are part of one of my couples), so I often hear it from the partner. If I am working with a couple, I am able to listen to them when I do a family history and glean more from them with the questions I ask. You have read many articles on line, most likely, about the narcissistic relationship to the wife/girlfriend. This article is going in a different direction.

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Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder – Enlightening Conversations

We gain a deeper appreciation of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from various vantage points: groups of symptoms, root causes of emotional troubles, variety of treatment approaches as well as many sensitive insights to further everyone’s understanding.  Even though there is a commonly agreed upon definition, trauma and the traumatic stress that ensues has different and unique meaning for different individuals.  Join us for a lively discussion as we share our varying approaches and understandings.

To learn more about the presenters:

Ellen Seigel, LISW-S To work with Ellen as a Transformational Life Coach contact her: ellen@BeHappyNoMatterWhat.com or call 614-389-5795 To receive enlightening Contemplative Thoughts daily and receive a chapter download from her book Be Happy No Matter What – 5 Steps to Inner Freedom, visit http://behappynomaterwhat.com

Jeannine Vegh, IMFT at Transformative Psychotherapy, LLC https://jkvegh.com Survivors of Narcissists Workshop available at Udemy https://www.udemy.com/course/embracin… Blogposts on Psychology, the Arts and Ohio Women’s History https://discerninggal.com

Disclaimer: As we are two humble therapists, all discussion you see between us in the video/podcast is based on our training and education, therapeutic work in our practices, and thoughtful opinions formed over our years. We are not the last word in this discussion, and we commit to providing ongoing resources beyond ourselves to enlarge your understanding of this complex subject. Thank you for viewing and we hope this will be helpful as you move forward on your journey.

Anger and Pride – A Fortunate Man: Denmark 2018

The Irony! I just finished watching this 2 hour and 47 minute film that I think will become or should become a classic. I wasn’t able to find a good trailer online with subtitles and so you will have to just read what I am telling you here. (smiling) This is a movie about a poor man who dies a poor man and the reason is because of his anger and pride.

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