Tag Archives: survivors

Virginia Roberts Giuffre – Nobody’s Girl

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People magazine

This book was probably the hardest and most challenging book for me to read. Not because of what she suffered, I was a social worker for 8 years and read hundreds of reports about child molest, dealt with clients who were trafficked, girls who were used as prostitutes on the street. It was the “Why” that kept nagging in the back of my head. Why was this incredibly, or seemingly strong woman having a book published posthumously? Why did she die by suicide? As a psychotherapist, I kept searching for answers throughout the book, and I walked away feeling as if I understood what they were.

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Survivors of Narcissist – Differences Between Men and Women

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Yes, there are male survivors of narcissistic women and I am beginning to see them come to my office more and more these days. While the DSM -5 states that 50-75% of narcissists are men, that leaves those 25-50% who are women. And, think of the books written to address daughters of Narcissistic Mothers – they had to have fathers too.

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In Order to Live – Yeonmi Park Book Review

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I had only learned of this young woman a week ago. My boyfriend mentioned her name, we looked her up and found lots of scathing reviews from liberal journalists who don’t know the first thing about psychology or survivors of communist countries. As soon as I heard more about the story, I wanted to read it immediately to see for myself. My step/adopt father came to the U.S. in 1956 from Hungary. Post-WWII, after failing as an ally (luckily), their country was communist until 1989. I grew up learning about communism, Russians and fearing this type of lifestyle. I also, myself, wrote a book about 1956, The Uprisers, in which I did an extensive amount of research. And, I am a trauma specialist in my day job.

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Loving the Narcissist: Patterns of Survivors

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The Journey

Let me in, let me see what is inside

Let me feel that place where you are trying to hide.

Two wounded souls from different places in time

Coming together without a map or a rhyme.

As you suffer in silence, I fly around in the dark

and search for words to help you embark.

Stolen moments meet us half way

to carry us forward thru a whole new day.

Two lovers gather in the evening silence

Yearning to touch and find their way once more.

They seek solace in the arms of each other

Hoping to find what they are looking for.

The past sits on the edge of reason and doubt

While it waits to be soothed and coddled.

Confusion lurks and passions await

Time moves on in haste.

The bed feels empty; the mind is reprieved

By a thought or a gesture that provides some relief.

I wait and I ponder and I wonder as I wander

The roads are clear but the climb is steep.

The painting is finished but the oils have yet to dry.

The journey is in motion and there is still more to do.

The dancers step forward and take their cue

While the room lets out a sigh…

The sounds are released and they move

Two people together, aware of nothing

But the instruments guiding their way.

When you find yourself writing poetry, you might be in love with a narcissist. The Imposter Syndrome, Anxious and/or Avoidant types, Survivors of Narcissistic Parents, Empaths and Highly Sensitive People. These are the patterns of women that I see who attract the narcissistic partner. Often these are very strong professional women in very capable positions. Many times, they make more money than the partner and, in these cases, I see the male taking a more entitled role. For example, the male tends to become very lazy in the sense that he is not pulling an equal share of the weight, in the home, to compensate for his wife or partner making the higher income. This makes her life even more difficult.

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