Virginia Roberts Giuffre Explains My Book, Posthumously

Yesterday morning, 12/1/25, I published an ebook, seen above through Books2Read. Last night, while reading “Nobody’s Girl,” By Virginia Roberts Giuffre, I was caught off guard by a passage she wrote in her book on pages 113-114. I thought to myself, Wow! I wish I had known she wrote this amazing explanation, as it is better than mine. It explains what I am capturing in this title from a survivors perspective. Or, to put it more bluntly “From the horses mouth.” She loved horses, so I think she would appreciate this.

I want to include the passage here for your own discovery and so that you might consider reading her book – to learn more, as well as reading my book for the emotional support. I will come back here, when I am finished reading Nobody’s Girl as I want to pay tribute to this very well written book. For now:

It probably goes without saying that, given what my father and his friend Forrest had done to me when I was a child, being trafficked by Epstein and Maxwell was painfully triggering. To the extent that I saw the two of them as pseudo-parental figures, their disregard for my welfare as they lent me out for sex made me feel a familiar strain of worthlessness. But at times, that familiarity was weirdly comforting. This is complicated to explain, but that echo of past hurts was somehow bearable to me because I’d felt it-and somehow endured it-so many times before. It was like finding myself once more in a room I’d lived in for years. I hated that room, but I knew its contours-the shape of its windows, the nap of its carpet beneath my feet, the click of the door lock when it was thrown. I knew I could exist in that room because I’d existed there before. At that point, at least, this made me feel less afraid.

This is what I am trying to express in my title “The Uncomfortable Comfortableness with a Narcissist.” The familiarity was/is weirdly comforting and Virginia goes on to add how her visual and audio senses are enlisted by her hatred for this comfortableness. The shape of the windows, the nap of the carpet on her feet, the click of the door lock. She knew how to be in that place, as it was so familiar. Since it was so familiar, she wasn’t even as afraid.

In my book, I am helping you to discover the different parts of our self that are employed as our agency is taken away, while we are being lured into a relationship with the narcissist. Unsuspectingly – at first – yet somehow very comforting, very familiar, very Déjà vu. Once you are in, the uncomfortable knowledge that OMG! I am here again. Now what?

No worries, I am providing you with psycho-education to become more conscious of this process, along with six helpful homework assignments to begin re-discovering your sense of self. When you use these tools, along with a psychotherapist of your choosing, whom you can find to support you on this journey, these are the keys to moving forward in your life. To having a healthy relationship and never going back to the uncomfortable comfortableness ever again.

Survivor Stories – Human Trafficking

Virginia Giuffre

There are many survivors of the Jeffrey Epstein/Ghislaine Maxwell human trafficking scandal. While we only hear about the women, I have seen a photo online of him standing with a group of boys. I imagine that they are having a harder time coming forward, as male sexual abuse survivors often do. Virginia Giuffre appears to be the most outspoken, female survivor, with her book “Nobody’s Girl.” What is sad is two things, one that she felt so alone and depressed that she died by suicide. Secondly, that one of the other victim’s a Korean woman by the name of Rina Oh and she were in pursuit of justice in different ways and at odds with each other at the same time.

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You Might be a Batterer If:

Sleeping with the Enemy – Julia Roberts 1991

I wrote the following many years ago, but since I saved it on the Icloud, in one fell swoop, I lost all my dates. I am guessing this was written in the early 2000’s. There are three lists to distinguish between “Batterer,” “Victim,” and “Survivor.” The sentences are sarcastic in the sense that this is how the person is thinking. Meaning, if someone is a batterer, they are going to agree with these sentences and not find anything wrong with it.

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Why Trans are Taking Advantage of Women Now

Men did not want to be women until around the pandemic. People were isolated and went stir crazy boarded up in their homes around the world. Until then, men didn’t really care too much to be women. Trans thinking was a small minority of people and let’s look at the reasons why – in my opinion.

  1. Women didn’t have the right to vote until 1920 and minority groups of women didn’t have the right to vote until much later. Asian women 1952, Native American women 1962, Black women 1965, for Latinas, there are three dates: 1929 for literate women, 1935 for Puerto Ricans and then 1975 prohibiting discrimination against non-English speaking people. Before 1920, men could vote without a problem.
  2. Women could not compete in the Olympics until 1920 and this was a special “Women’s Olympics.” Until 1972 with Title IX, you did not see women’s sports teams in schools and universities. Before this, men WERE sports.
  3. Women being allowed to work. Well, prostitution is the oldest profession known to women, but when it comes to legal paid professions, there was factory work – for poor people and women were not looked at too favorably if they had to do this. You could be a nanny or servant in a home. Then you were allowed to work as a Rosie in WWII. A couple of women worked as de-coders during the war, but this was an exception to the rule (they were pretty damn good!). Until the 60’s, you really didn’t see women having careers – as a rule. And, guess what, women didn’t get paid equally to men.
  4. Girls Scouts of America, was brought here by Juliette Lowe, who knew the Baden-Powell’s in England that founded the original boys and girls guide groups there. The Girl Scouts were founded here, specifically like in England, to help poor girls gather practical skills to survive in the world. Men already knew these skills, as they learned these things growing up.
  5. Daughters of the American Revolution was founded one year after the Sons of the American Revolution, by four women and this WAS a genealogical group whereby women had to prove (as did the men) that they were descendants of someone involved in the American Revolution (soldier, activist, etc…). As a previous member (before they began allowing men) and an adopted female, I had to prove my heritage by finding my original birth certificate before I was adopted. Luckily, Ohio allows this. Now, men can hand over fake birth certificates where the state now “legally” declares them a woman. Not the original birth certificate, which would say they were a male. Adopted folks still need to prove their original birth heritage. The four women who founded this once prestigious organization are turning in their graves in shame.
  6. Bathrooms and locker rooms. Well, if a man was caught in the bathroom or a locker room say at a ladies tennis court, their husbands would have beat the living daylights out of this person for even attempting to pretend to be a lady and peep in on their women. I am pretty sure this was not allowed at private country clubs either. We had respect for women at that time, even if we didn’t allow them to work or vote. Women were protected in some way shape or form.
  7. Women owning homes. My very own home in Columbus Ohio was first purchased by a woman in 1928. She was not married yet. I am not sure when a woman could first own a home but I can definitely attest to the fact that it was not easy for a woman to do so. You could not even open a line of credit, as a woman, until 1971, so if you purchased a home, you had to pay cash. This might have come from family inheritances or a family loan. Men NEVER had a problem buying homes, opening lines of credit.
  8. Going to college – there were a couple of colleges that allowed women to attend. Most notably here in Ohio, we had Oberlin and Antioch in the mid 1800’s. Yale and Princeton did not accept women until 1969 and Harvard it would not be until 1977. Men NEVER had a problem going to college prior to these years. If they had the money and for the ivy-league groups – the prestige – they went to college.
  9. Women’s prisons were first established between the 1870’s-1900 in the U.S. Now, suddenly, men can say they are a “woman” and they get a free pass to sexually abuse and impregnate women in federal prisons. The first male to female surgery – paid for by the prison system was in 2022. Now, finally, President Trump is trying to get this abolished. Trans people have “concerns” about their safety in men’s prisons. When was it “safe” to be in prison?
  10. Convents – there is already a man trying to insert himself into a nunnery in England. He is trying to establish himself as a Carolinian “sister.” Luckily, the nuns in this organization are saying they are unable to “accommodate a transgender nun.” Can you imagine? The sacredness of this woman’s organization, taking vows of chastity and suddenly a dick walks in the shower?

Men who want to be women need to have their own trans groups. Women have established themselves in women’s groups to have a safe space to be women, to talk, to share psychological and emotional space with one another. It is a sacred place to discuss violence in the home but also a place to discuss family matters; rearing children, dealing with husbands, taking care of the home, and financial support. A woman’s group is not a place for men, any more than I would want to invade a private men’s group such as the mason’s or a men’s athletic club. The privacy of women’s groups are no different than the privacy of Hungarian Cultural Associations (for Hungarians) or other ethnic groups. It is no different than African-Americans not wanting white people to join their group. It is why an Indian woman once asked me in an Indian store in California “What are you doing here?” It was sacred to her and I was not offended because I realized this suddenly. The same stares have occurred in La Michoacana stores as well. We have to accept that these places are for their (our) safety, their community, and their cultural sanity. Of course me visiting a retail store is hardly the same as invading a woman’s bathroom, sports team or prison.

To get a better perspective, take a look a this timeline of women’s legal rights in the U.S. and keep in mind that it depended on which state you lived in. There is no “timeline of men’s legal rights” in the U.S. except for minorities and foreigners. This is the reason why I have no sympathy for men who want to be women and take over our rights and spaces that we have worked very hard to gain. It is why I have no sympathy for liberal women “feminists,” who have become hypocrites. Why I left the Daughters of the American Revolution (last month) who shamelessly turned the organization upside down in 2022 (unbeknownst to me as this is when I as admitted). As a woman who has been reading and writing about women’s history for her entire life, I am not about to abandon my ancestors ever. Part of who I am is a woman with integrity. Men who choose to dress like women have no integrity or self-respect. They have no respect for women. This is a new way of being a misogynist and raping women worldwide.

As we celebrate WOMEN’s History month, we are not celebrating men who want to be women. That is a choice. Arguably they believe their mental health depends on this. However, a good therapist could help support them in this battle. Real women do not have a choice in the matter and we did not have choices in history and still battle with men taking advantage of us worldwide. Women are still forced into human trafficking – more than men. They are still forced into female genital mutilation in Muslim groups. They are still forced into marriage as children in third world countries. Every 9 seconds in the U.S. a woman is assualted or beaten. Not a man, not a man wanting to be a woman – A WOMAN.

Please bare this in mind when you are thinking about women’s history month during the month of March and in every single month thereafter. Women’s rights are sacred to women. Real biological women. XX

In Order to Live – Yeonmi Park Book Review

I had only learned of this young woman a week ago. My boyfriend mentioned her name, we looked her up and found lots of scathing reviews from liberal journalists who don’t know the first thing about psychology or survivors of communist countries. As soon as I heard more about the story, I wanted to read it immediately to see for myself. My step/adopt father came to the U.S. in 1956 from Hungary. Post-WWII, after failing as an ally (luckily), their country was communist until 1989. I grew up learning about communism, Russians and fearing this type of lifestyle. I also, myself, wrote a book about 1956, The Uprisers, in which I did an extensive amount of research. And, I am a trauma specialist in my day job.

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Women’s Rights Annihilated by Narcissistic Men and Feminists.

American life is in subtle ways so one-sided. The real natural man is just in open rebellion against the utterly inhuman form of life.

Carl Gustav Jung – a 1990 Documentary of an INterview (Psychology Library YouTube)

What has happened 103 years later, post 19th Amendment, that “some women,” the feminists, ironically are no longer fighting for women’s rights? Why are men suddenly determined to become women and take over our locker rooms, bathrooms, sports leagues and getting away with it? Why are there young children, taking the stand at PTA meetings, begging for support from the school board? Why are teachers turning against parents and sexualizing children across the country? Why are pediatricians not caring about ethics in favor of money from big pharmaceutical companies and the hospitals lavishing in this new cash cow – post pandemic favoritism (rhetorical yes)? Why is our own President, lavishing awards to men on International Women’s Day and promoting trans rights? And, why are we suddenly seeing children being brought to trans events – with a huge sensitivity now to pedophiles – and actors supporting this?

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Anti-White Sentiment – A Disturbing Trend

It is terribly disappointing to hear our president state “I am a White boy but I am not Stupid.” He is essentially saying White people, his own race, are stupid. I am an intelligent woman and I am not ashamed of being White. I make no apologies for my ancestors – who I didn’t know and even those I did know. I am not them and they are not me.

In the late 1800’s, early 1900’s, Anti-Semitism went on the rise amongst fashionable Europe. When I wrote my novel “The Uprisers: A Hungarian Historical Fiction,” I found that during that same time, in Hungary (and I am sure other villages around Europe) leaflets were dropped from airplanes to make the locals aware of the negative propaganda in regard to those who were Jewish. Now we have social media to indoctrinate people in this hate mentality. No more need to pay pilots!

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Hungarian-Americans Celebrate 66th Anniversary – Was it worth it? American Now

In memory of my step/adopt father, Antal Végh, who came to this country in 1956, at the age of 19 and died only eight days before the 40th anniversary.

What would my dad say now, if he saw the country he escaped to in 1956, to have freedom, in the wake of communism in Hungary? I wonder what he would think of his daughter, standing in line at Kroger, in New Albany, Ohio, for thirty minutes around 8pm because they only had one cashier. No more “Three’s a Crowd,” customer service rules there (from a long ago commercial). An impromptu and unplanned demonstration, you might say, was going on with those of us in line. We refused to use self-service because most of us were in our 50’s and 60’s and understood what self-service meant. We lived through having the luxury of gas station attendants who washed our windows and changed our oil for free. What started with one lane for “self-serve” at a gas station went to all self-serve and people in a kiosk who couldn’t care less about your car.

I had the unfortunate experience the other night, while at the same Kroger’s dealing with an angry kiosk employee. I had rapped on the window because I kept saying hello and she didn’t answer. I peered through the window around the corner and saw her standing there, out of view. When she got to the window she replied “You didn’t need to tap on the window.” I replied that I had tried calling out and she did not respond. Kroger Fuel will not accept Master Card, so I have to go to the kiosk to pay. I know what happens to pin numbers at the pump, by ne’re-do-wells. So, what would my dad say to my having to stand in line for food? He refused to go to any restaurant, when he was alive, if there was a line. This is because, in Hungary, he remembered food lines and would never approach one ever again.

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Human Violence Not Gun Violence

Pew Research Center

Prohibition taught us many things. If we take away something that someone wants and already has the right to have, they will get it anyway they can. The mafia took over and ran our streets. Abortion rights were given to women so that they didn’t have to go into a filthy hovel and have some woman or man cut them up and perform a “surgery” that many women died from. The same people who fight for Abortion rights are fighting for “gun violence” laws. Politicians, who don’t give a damn about people and are focused on winning elections have said the same stupid lines since Columbine. Women and men continue to have no respect for their bodies and continue to not use birth control and bring babies into the world that they have no business giving birth to. This is the argument. Listen. Read a history book.

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Confessions of a Trauma Bond Survivor

The Covert Narcissist taking his mask off – in the end.

I met with a woman, I will name “Annika,” (a favorite pseudonym of mine), who told me some details about her life story with men. She gave me permission to write about her story here. I am going to write this in “first person,” as if it were a memoir. She is not a client and, I say this, so if my clients are reading this, they won’t think it is their story. I am breaking this up into different parts. I start with this aspect of her journey: coming back from being in a trauma bond after the break-up with a covert narcissist.

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